i know things have been quiet around here, and that’s mostly because they have been so loud everywhere else. there is so much i want to say about where i’ve been in the last three (!) months. how my work has shaped me and how – miraculously – i have found a way to shape my work.
my job is not new, but my power in that space is: i love what i get to do – for this city and its students, for my fellow twenty-something comrades searching for connecting points in this large and discordant place we live. and i hope my words find a way to come into this space, because the work i do has become the ground i walk on these days. and i want to talk about it. but for today…
today i woke up to the steady sound of rain, falling on the world outside. i live on the second floor, which means the rooftop of this house is just outside my window, the window by my bed and the pillows where i rest my sleepy head. and there’s nothing that whispers “slow down” to me like the sound of rain to my tired tired body. so i stayed in bed for a couple more hours.
later today is a birthday party: streamers and balloons, pizza and a stack of dvds; and if we’re lucky: something pretty and sweet to drink. i made a quick jaunt to the store last night to pick up a couple bottles of something special. they’re chilling in the fridge now. if the concoction is as delicious as i remember it to be the first time i mixed it up – kind of on a whim – i’ll post up a recipe for it soon. (though calling it a “recipe” is kind of a stretch; it’s really just equal parts pink stuff, orange stuff, and bubbly stuff.)
but until this “later” arrives, a few hours stretch before me. there’s coffee in the french press, a couple of partially-read books on my bed, and – after the quick-stop rain that has already passed on – a now-sunlit window to daydream out of. this time is precious.
in a scattering of mere hours, monday will hit, and probably hit hard, and i will likely recall these words i’ve written with a sharp sting of jealousy… of my own self. how unbecoming. but if that’s the way things go, so be it. i am here now. and for once, after much too long, i am very very here.